Really

Have you ever been shit on? Just completely shit on? Ever wanted a break? Just once? This is where we find our humble narrator. I was feeling alright. I had made peace with certain things but one thing just fucking broke this camel's back.

When you hit bottom this isn't some kind of alarm that lets you know that you might be out of your depth. It slams you in right in the fucking face. Harder than you knew something could. If this was a movie I would be mouth open on a curb with Ed Norton standing above me.

Alright, so I may not be half as good as I thought. This I can deal with. But when I see some of the people who are, I don't know to shit or go blind. Since I can't see right now I guess I made my choice. What the fuck? Really, just really.

Things never seem to work out in my favor. This is mostly my own doing. I know this. I fuck things up with the kind of reckless abandon that anarchists reserve for trade summits. But in this one instance I feel like I really tried. I played nice. I gave it the old college try. But recent events have decide that may not be enough.

As always I will do my own thing. I will prove myself yet again. But just once I would dig the easy path. I would like things to work out. But it seems that I will always have to do it on my own. If your with me great. If you want to continue doing the same things everyone else has, please continue. But if you want to really do something interesting come with me. If there is a path of least resistance it ain't the one I'm on.